Where does PLEASE come from?

PLEASE is a popular DBT, (Dialectical Behaviour Therapy,) acronym that may help to remember the basics to taking care of your body. Having your body in peak condition may create more mental flexibility when emotional difficulties come up.

We can choose to let them rule because its easier. Or we can choose to challenge emotional difficulties and put into practise some positive coping techniques. We can also notice more easily when we’re not in a good headspace to deal with them effectively.

PLEASE

Physical Illness: Get it treated or give yourself some slack. When you don’t feel well, you’ll frequently feel like you can’t cope with emotional difficulties. You may need to give yourself more practise of noticing when you’re tired or drained. Recognise that then is not a good time to engage with anything emotionally difficult. Give yourself a break, walk away from it or put it on the back burner.

Eating: Eat heathy if you can. Excessive sugar or fat may give your body more energy than it requires. Equally, not eating or skipping meals can make you more likely to be hangry and to engage in anger should any emotional difficulties crop up.

Avoid mood-altering drugs: Stay away from non-prescribed medication and drugs. I’d like to also raise awareness of prescribed drugs. I’m not a doctor, or medically qualified, but since having been prescribed medication for anxiety and mood regulation, I’ve never felt better. Despite going through a divorce and the ups and downs of meeting a new partner, I’ve never felt more stable and better in myself. I’m not saying I don’t have bad days. I do, but I have days where I’m more emotional neutral. For me, that’s a huge improvement.

I had some months of adjustment getting used to it, when I first off started using my medication and it can make you feel drowsy. It doesn’t work for everyone, but medication can give you the edge to better moderate your emotions, alongside practising any DBT skills.

Sleep: Get the right amount of sleep. I used to lie awake for hours trying to get to sleep. My mind was overactive and I was unable to stop myself from thinking constantly. Even before taking the medication, I tried something called progressive muscle relaxation. It didn’t seem like it would work, but I was about ready to give anything a try. With Progressive Muscle Relaxation, you squeeze certain muscles groups and then release them. The audio I used was Excel at Life.

Doing this also helped me to notice quite how much tension I had stored up in my body over the day. After using the audio and relaxing the muscles, it encouraged me to relax. After I’d used it every single night for a few months, something changed. Now when I hear the audio, within the first few minutes I feel sleepy and my body starts to relax, I don’t even need to go through the whole audio.

Exercise: Try to schedule in some form of exercise every week and make a habit of it. I don’t know about you, but I find anxiety can build up in the wake of excessive adrenaline. For whatever reason you might have it, either because your body recently activated flight, fight and freeze mode in an argument or an episode. Or if you’ve just buzzing with it and your mind is over active, I find this inclines me towards urgency based panic over small things. Once the pathways are opened in your mind, its so easy to go back there again.

Now I notice when I have excessive adrenaline and I try to remember to exercise it out of my system. So whether you like swimming, dance, running or cycling, it’s good to ensure a regular habit of weekly exercise.

What can you do?

Think about what steps you could take which could help you keep your body in peak condition, so you can cope with your emotions more effectively.